Weekends Effectively For Better Stress Management

For working individuals, the weekends offer an opportunity to rejuvenate yourself and employ proper stress management so your body and mind can be ready to face a new week ahead. Sadly though, most people are unable to refocus their mind during weekends and they are still consumed by the various stressful situations they can experience during weekdays onto the weekends. This is the last thing that you'd want to happen if you wanted to rejuvenate yourself and feel revitalized.

Below are some of the suggested activities you can do over the weekend. They are known to be effective stress-busters for a much improved stress management weekend campaign.

Read a Book

If you like reading or find this activity to be stress relieving, why not use your time on the weekends to sit back, relax, and enjoy a good read? By reading, you can re-focus your attention onto the subject of the book you are reading and away from anything that is presently causing you stress, whether it be a deadline you have to meet at work or some projects at school.

You can sit on a relaxing chair or lounger while reading a book. If possible, do this in your patio or in the garden wherein you can enjoy a lot of fresh air for a truly relaxing experience. Plus, reading is also considered as a healthy habit that you must cultivate all the time!

Pamper Yourself

The kind of pampering that you must treat yourself to during weekends can vary according to your own personal definition of pampering. For one person, it means a trip to the salon for a relaxing foot spa and pedicure, while for others it can be working out in the gym. For some others, it can also refer to a day of shopping! Find out what is your own brand of pampering and do just that in the weekend to effectively manage stress.

Do Something New

Weekdays often force you to follow a routine. And since not all people like being forced into a routine, this can also contribute to the stress you are experiencing on a daily basis, aside from the stress that comes with the actual work. Hence, do something new in the weekend! You can either check out a new museum in your area, take a stroll in the park, or invite your friends for an activity you haven't done before – the whole point in all this is to expose yourself to new environments and activities for a fresh perspective!

Massage

This is the number one reliable stress buster and must not be missing in your weekend stress management technique. You can then set a weekend appointment with a professional masseur for a relaxing day of massage. This is good not only for relaxing your body, but also your mind, which is why it is a very effective stress buster.

Have Fun Indoors

You do not need to go out of the house for weekend stress management. You can simply stay at home, cook dinner, and enjoy a movie in your living room. The whole idea is to create a relaxing ambiance wherein you can unwind and not think of anything else.

So, what have you planned for the weekend? If you are looking to get better stress management, choose from any of the above activities to face the new week ahead with a rejuvenated mind and body!

source: www.prudenceliving.com

Entrance Into The Society

The desire of pleasing is, of course, the basis of social connection. Persons who enter society with the intention of producing an effect, and of being distinguished, however clever they may be, are never agreeable. They are always tiresome, and often ridiculous. Persons, who enter life with such pretensions, have no opportunity for improving themselves and profiting by experience. They are not in a proper state to observe: indeed, they look only for the effect which they produce, and with that they are not often gratified. They thrust themselves into all conversations, indulge in continual anecdotes, which are varied only by dull disquisitions, listen to others with impatience and heedlessness, and are angry that they seem to be attending to themselves. Such men go through scenes of pleasure, enjoying nothing. They are equally disagreeable to themselves and others. Young men should, therefore, content themselves with being natural. Let them present themselves with a modest assurance: let them observe, hear, and examine, and before long they will rival their models.

The quality which a young man should most affect in intercourse with gentlemen, is a decent modesty: but he must avoid all bashfulness or timidity. His flights must not go too far; but, so far as they go, let them be marked by perfect assurance.



Among persons who are much your seniors behave with the utmost respectful deference. As they find themselves sliding out of importance they may be easily conciliated by a little respect.

By far the most important thing to be attended to, is ease of manner. Grace may be added afterwards, or be omitted altogether: it is of much less moment than is commonly believed. Perfect propriety and entire ease are sufficient qualifications for standing in society, and abundant prerequisites for distinction.

There is the most delicate shade of difference between civility and intrusiveness, familiarity and common-place, pleasantry and sharpness, the natural and the rude, gaiety and carelessness; hence the inconveniences of society, and the errors of its members. To define well in conduct these distinctions, is the great art of a man of the world. It is easy to know what to do; the difficulty is to know what to avoid.

Long usage a sort of moral magnetism, a tact acquired by frequent and long associating with others alone give those qualities which keep one always from error, and entitle him to the name of a thorough gentleman.

A young man upon first entering into society should select those persons who are most celebrated for the propriety and elegance of their manners. He should frequent their company and imitate their conduct. There is a disposition inherent, in all, which has been noticed by Horace and by Dr. Johnson, to imitate faults, because they are more readily observed and more easily followed. There are, also, many foibles of manner and many refinements of affectation, which sit agreeably upon one man, which if adopted by another would become unpleasant. There are even some excellences of deportment which would not suit another whose character is different. For successful imitation in anything, good sense is indispensable. It is requisite correctly to appreciate the natural differences between your model and yourself, and to introduce such modifications in the copy as may be consistent with it.

Let not any man imagine, that he shall easily acquire these qualities which will constitute him a gentleman. It is necessary not only to exert the highest degree of art, but to attain also that higher accomplishment of concealing art. The serene and elevated dignity which mark that character, are the result of untiring and arduous effort.

Quotes That Will Free Your Mind

If you truly want to change your life, you must first change your mind.  You must free it from the restrictive thinking that holds you back.Here are 50 thought-provoking quotes gathered from site Everyday Life Lessons, and from our blog archive that will help tweak your thinking and set your mind free.

1. You are only destined to become one person – the person you decide to be.
2. Do good and feel good.  Do bad and feel bad.  It’s that simple.
3. You are what you do today, not what you say you’ll do tomorrow.
4. We all make choices, but in the end our choices make us.
5. Ultimately, it’s not what you do every once in a while; it’s what you dedicate yourself to on a regular basis that makes the difference.
6. Stay true to yourself.  Never be ashamed of doing what feels right.  Decide what you think is right and stick to it.
7. If you don’t stand for anything, you will remain forever on your knees.
8. No amount of money will make you happy if you aren’t happy with yourself.
9. You know you’ve made the right decision when there is peace in your heart.
10. Don’t worry if your goals seem crazy to other people; oftentimes the crazy ideas are the ones that have the greatest impact.
11. If you’re thinking like everyone else, then you aren’t thinking. 
12. Control your own destiny or someone else will try for you.
13. Sometimes standing up to your friends can be just as difficult as standing up to your enemies.
14. The unhappiest people in this world are the people who care the most about what everyone else thinks.
15. When people undermine your dreams, predict your doom, or criticize you, remember, they’re telling you their story, not yours.
16. There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally.
17. No one in the world was ever you before, with your particular gifts and abilities and possibilities.
18. Your greatest task isn’t to find love, but to discover and destroy all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
19. A loving, happy person lives in a loving, happy world.  A hateful, miserable person lives in a hateful, miserable world.  The world around you reflects YOU.
20. Worry gives small things a big shadow.
21. Focus your conscious mind on things you desire not things you fear.  Doing so brings dreams to life.
22. It’s not the mistakes and failures you have to worry about, it’s the opportunities you miss when you don’t even try that hurt the most.
23. It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one over and over again.
24. To get something you’ve never had, you must do something you’ve never done.
25. The harder thing to do and the right thing to do are usually the same thing.
26. Our problems are really our blessings if we use them to grow stronger. 
27. Anyone can run away; it’s super easy.  Facing problems and working through them, that’s what makes you strong.
28. When you have two good options, always go with the one that scares you the most, because that’s the one that’s going to help you grow.
29. Courage is being scared to death, and then taking the next step anyway.
30. Sometimes our greatest insight comes from our failure, not from our accomplishments.
31. You need to screw up to learn.  You need to experience it all to create greatness.
32. Just because you don’t understand something now doesn’t mean the explanation doesn’t exist.
33. Not knowing everything about your future is a good thing.
34. Don’t worry about what you can’t control and you may liberate yourself.
35. People of average ability often achieve outstanding success because they don’t know when to quit.  Most people succeed simply because they are determined to.
36. Temporary happiness isn’t worth long-term pain.
37. Patience can be bitter, but the seeds you plant now will bear sweet fruit.
38. The less you expect, the more pleasant life gets.
39. The more you are in a state of gratitude, the more you will attract things to be grateful for.
40. The things you take for granted, someone else is praying for.
41. It usually isn’t what you have or where you are or what you’re doing that makes you happy.  It’s how you think about it all.
42. Do not dwell so much on creating your perfect life that you forget to live.
43. You are not in competition with anybody except yourself; plan to outdo your past not other people.
44. To admit that you were wrong is to declare that you are wiser now than you were before.
45. Humans see what they want to see.
46. If you spend too much time judging yourself, you won’t have any time to love yourself or anyone else.  
47. At the end of the day, you can either focus on what’s tearing you apart or what’s holding you together.
48. Look through the front windshield and not the rearview mirror.
49. You don’t get to choose how you are going to die, or when.  But you can choose how you are going to live, right now.
50. Be done with regrets; they are an excuse for people who have failed.  You still have a chance.

Are We Genetically Programmed to Fall in Love?

Valentine’s Day, love songs, romance novels—do they influence falling in love? On the surface it seems like they do, but scientific research suggests that there’s another cupid at work: instinct. Love, specifically the passionate variety, is an emotion that is almost beyond our control. Humans, it seems, are programmed to take this amorous tumble. Forget the roses and heart-shaped box of chocolates—it’s our genes that are on the hook for our addiction to love.

According to Elizabeth Pillsworth, assistant professor of evolutionary anthropology at California State University, passionate love has been around since the dawn of time. “It's hard to say with any great confidence when the emotion of love may have evolved,” says Pillsworth, “but given the fact that we haven't found any human populations in which it seems to be absent, either in modern or historical records, we can assume that [love] is characteristic of humans, like feeling compassion or shame.”

Love is one of our oldest emotions. Our hunting-and-gathering predecessors were just as consumed by it as we are today. Back then, passionate love brought people together for survival, safety and continuation of the species. Today, we might not need a partner to help us stay alive, feel secure, or even have babies, but at the heart of love, the need is the same: the desire to love someone and have that amorous feeling reciprocated. This emotion is universal. It crosses generations, cultures and geographical borders.
Why does love make us do crazy things?

So why does passionate love make us act like we do? Triggered by age-old instincts, modern love has a lot to answer for. "People literally describe spending upwards of 90 percent of their waking energy thinking about the object of their desire, planning ways to inadvertently ‘bump into’ him,” says Pillsworth. We dream about the moment when they tell us they love us back. Passionate love with its first flush of excitement is typically a brief condition. It’s normally restricted to the early stages of a relationship. On the plus side, it’s a very romantic phase, however, it’s also incredibly time-consuming and occasionally verges into obsessive territory—the lovesick behaviour called limerence. “Dorothy Tennov, a social psychologist, coined the term in her 1979 book, Love and Limerence,” says Pillsworth. “[It captured] that aspect of love characterized by intrusive thoughts, emotional roller coasters, desperate desire for deep emotional attachment, and even quasi-stalking behaviours.” Passionate love can make some of us do crazy things, but for the majority it’s a helpful tool.

Take the selection of a mate. Our instincts make us seek out certain traits in a potential significant other. Falling in passionate love is the first step in the process. “In looking for a long-term partner, both [sexes] are most anxious to find someone who is kind, mutually attracted to them, and has a good sense of humour,” says Pillsworth. “Beyond that, men place more emphasis on the physical attractiveness of a long-term partner than women do. Women place more emphasis on the resource-acquiring characteristics of a long-term partner.” These preferences date back to ancient times. Men searched for the curvy, “womanly” body type that signals a healthy mate for child-bearing, while the opposite was true for women. A virile, broad-shouldered male was ideal for a sexual conquest, but not necessarily for a life-long relationship. Women primarily sought providers. Falling in love was a good test to see if the person in question was up to scratch before any further commitment was established. Love today isn’t much different.
Is love meant to last forever?

When the bloom of this initial affection wilts and a strong, but less intense, love takes over, the relationship can hit a turning point. Will it spark a break up, or a lengthy monogamous union? Isn’t monogamy in our genes, too? Scientists remain mixed on the subject. Some research suggests that people in the midst of passionate love seem blind to other attractive individuals. They’re focused on that one potential partner, despite other enticing prospects nearby. Such findings fuel the monogamous point of view, but other studies differ. Contrary evidence indicates that men and women will explore extra sexual and relationship opportunities if given the chance, thus monogamy is just a passing phase. Science has been unable to support either theory completely. What is for certain is that we have an ability to use our instincts in conjunction with our own decision-making processes. “[We] have a highly flexible, responsive mating system,” says Pillsworth. “We take in information about our current circumstances: our age, attractiveness, cultural context, and behave accordingly.” Passionate love with all its benefits—and faults—may be driven more by our minds than our hearts, but at least we’re not alone in acting under its spell. We are all at the mercy of this crazy little thing called love.


Web exclusive, February 2011

Love your Life

The 3 Best Foods to Boost Sex Drive

1. Watermelon

This juicy red fruit could be the new sexual star. While watermelon is 92 percent water, the remaining eight percent contains the phytonutrient citrulline, which converts to arginine, an amino acid that relaxes blood vessels, according to 2008 research from Texas A&M University’s department of horticultural sciences. Although not as organ-specific as drugs that treat men’s erectile dysfunction, watermelon may help improve blood flow to erectile tissue (present in the female clit¬oral area as well as the male penis), increasing arousal. Scientists at the university’s Fruit and Vegetable Improvement Center are now working on increasing the fruit’s citrulline content.

But if you are trying to conceive, don’t overdo it! Watermelon, like tomatoes, contains the antioxidant lycopene, which is in the same family as carotene and therefore has the same beneficial antioxidant effects. On the one hand, that’s great since carotene, found in many brightly coloured foods, has been shown to lower the risk of cancer and heart disease. But it is also anti-estrogenic, says Dr. Sony Sierra, a reproductive endocrinologist and infertility specialist at Toronto’s LifeQuest Centre for Reproductive Medicine, “so a very high volume may block estrogen and prevent the lining of the uterus from growing and the fertilized egg from implanting.” Some of Sierra’s patients have disordered eating habits and eat massive amounts of high-carotene foods such as carrots or kale. She advises clients to follow Canada’s Food Guide, which recommends a wide variety of vegetables and fruit, in seven or eight half-cup servings daily for women (up to 10 servings for men).


2. Saffron

Massimo Marcone, an associate professor of food science at the University of Guelph, used to dismiss aphrodisiacs as mere folklore. In 2011, in fact, he conducted a thorough scientific review of more than 200 international studies on consumable aphrodisiacs, and rejected almost all as invalid. But Marcone was shocked to find that a few studies on one particular spice—saffron—held up to close scrutiny.

“Not only does saffron appear to have aphrodisiac properties for both men and women,” Marcone says, “but it helps with anxiety, insomnia, PMS and insulin resistance.”

The seductive spice, whose red-gold threads come from a type of crocus that is native to Mediterranean Europe and Southwest Asia (not the same variety that pokes its pretty head through Canadian snows in early spring), contains antioxidants including crocin, crocetin and safranal. These are believed to be responsible for increasing sexual desire and arousal, according to studies Marcone reviewed that measured blood flow to sexual organs and frequency of sexual encounters after consuming the spice.

The ancients knew saffron’s power: It’s said that Alexander the Great added it to his rice and tea, Cleopatra bathed in it before meeting her lovers, and Romans were known to sprinkle saffron on newlyweds’ beds.

Available in supermarket spice aisles and used in Spanish paella, Moroccan tajine, Italian risotto and many Persian/Iranian dishes, saffron is pricey, running from $50 to $300 an ounce. But a little—a tiny pinch—goes a very long way, says post-doctoral fellow Sanan Wang, who worked with Marcone on the review. ’

What about other spices in your kitchen? Nutmeg, cloves, garlic and ginger also look promising for sexual potency, Marcone says, but more research is needed. Don’t hold your breath, though; none of these natural products can be patented, so drug companies aren’t racing to sponsor such a study.


3. Oysters

Skeptics have dismissed the purported aphrodisiac benefits of eating oysters as purely psychological, based on their suggestive shape and slippery texture. But Gloria Tsang, a Vancouver registered dietitian and the founder of nutrition network HealthCastle.com, says there may be something to the belief. “A lot of shellfish—including oysters, clams, crabs, lobsters and mussels—are high in zinc, which can trigger a surge in the production of sex hormones.”

Tsang adds that these bivalve mollusks also contain two rare amino acids: D-aspartic acid and N-methyl-D-aspartate. Joint American-Italian research in 2005 at Barry University in Miami and the Laboratory of Neurobiology in Naples, Italy, found that giving these amino acids to rats increased testosterone in the males and progesterone in the females—both are hormones associated with greater sexual activity.


Love your Life

How Weight Affects Your Sex Life

Sometimes what’s needed to boost libido isn’t a specific food, but sufficient calories. In a 2010 multi-centre study including the department of psychiatry at Toronto General Hospital and universities in the U.S., the U.K. and Germany, two thirds of 242 young women age 18 to 32 who had eating disorders that restricted calories reported low sexual functioning. The study concluded that a low body weight is associated with sexual anxiety, a loss of libido and avoidance of sexual relationships.

Being too thin can also hinder fertility, says Sierra, by disturbing the delicate interplay of the hypothalamus, pituitary gland and ovaries, preventing regular cycles. “It can also affect the synchrony involving signals to the uterine lining, so that even if you produce an egg, the lining won’t be getting enough nutrients to sustain a pregnancy.”

In general, she recommends a body mass index between 18 and 24, which is in line with Health Canada’s recommendations for men and women.

Since fat is needed for producing sex hormones, avoid an extremely low-fat diet, and stick to healthy types of fat such as olive or canola oil, avocados, fatty fish and nuts such as almonds or walnuts.

Being too heavy can impair your sexual functioning, too. Sierra says being overweight can cause hormonal imbalances and, if you’re trying to get pregnant, can disturb the growth of a healthy egg. In men, a big belly keeps the sperm too warm, affecting their quality and motility. Tsang adds that reaching a healthy weight often improves a person’s sex life. “My clients often say that when they lose excess weight, they’re happier in the bedroom.”

This article was originally titled "Lovin' spoonfuls" in the October 2012 issue of Best Health. Subscribe today to get the full Best Health experience–and never miss an issue

Love your Life

 

4 Signs You're an Internet Addict

However, surfing the web can become an addiction for some people, says Linda Bell, CEO of Bellwood Health Services, an addiction-treatment centre in Toronto that offers both publicly funded and fee-for-service programs. “An Internet addiction is the same as any other addiction—you get [online] and you find that your behaviour becomes out of control,” she explains.

The U.S.-based Center for Online Addiction Recovery defines Internet addiction as a compulsive behaviour that dominates a person’s life. Though cyber sex and pornography use are the most common types of Internet addictions, people can also become addicted to online chatting, shopping, gambling and even website surfing. Here’s how to tell if it’s time to seek help for an Internet addiction.

1. You’re spending more time online than with family or friends
Internet addicts will choose to spend time online rather than participate in social activities, says Bell. “I did an interview recently with someone who was into gaming online. He would spend over eight hours a day after work gaming and it was interfering with his social life,” she describes.

If your Internet use is out of control, you may find that your family and friends question why you’re choosing the computer over them or express concern about the amount of time you’re spending online.

2. You’re neglecting yourself and your work
“We have clients who will be online for 15 hours at a time and don’t eat or wash,” says Jennifer Kotry, a therapist at Bellwood who treats individuals with Internet addictions.

You don’t have to spend more than half your day online to be suffering the symptoms of an Internet addiction—it’s the way your Internet use negatively affects your life that determines whether or not you have a problem, notes Kimberly Young, a psychologist and director of the Center for Internet Addiction Recovery. If you find that your Internet use is causing you to neglect your health, your chores and your work, it may be time to seek help.

3. You’re using the Internet to alter your mood
“Those who are depressed are three times more likely to become hooked on the [Internet], those who suffer from anxiety disorders are twice as likely, and those who suffer from an addiction to alcohol and drugs are twice as likely,” says Young.

Those that compulsively use the Internet may find that going online helps relieve the symptoms of a mood disorder—but the relief is short-lived. A study conducted by the Stanford Institute for the Quantitative Study of Society found that the more people used the Internet, the less time they spent in contact with real people, which could lead to loneliness and isolation.

4. You think about the Internet even when you’re not online
As with addictions to drugs or alcohol, Internet addicts are constantly searching for their next fix. If you’re preoccupied with your next purchase on eBay or tactics in an online game, you may have a problem.
How to find help

Internet addiction may be treated in a number of ways, including counseling, cognitive-behavioural therapy, group therapy and medication to treat underlying symptoms of anxiety or depression. Speak to your family doctor for advice or find a therapist who specializes in addiction treatment.

Web exclusive: November 2009 

 Love your Live

10 Steps to Increasing Your Energy

1. Prioritize yourself daily
So much to do and so little time to do it. If you don't make an effort to put yourself on your daily to-do list you know you'll be overlooked...wait, you already have been overlooked haven't you? Well, it's time then to make that extra effort and carve out just a little bit of time each day where you do something just for you. Make up your mind!

2. Move your body every day
Since you know that physical activity is so important for health, energy, weight management and longevity, today find a way to get to it, even if you lack desire or don't believe you have the time. Exercise energizes, and once you make it a regular part of your day, even in small increments, excuses like lack of time, energy or motivation will no longer be an issue.
If your busy schedule restricts you to less exercise than you're used to, don't wait for more time, start with less. Incorporate at least ten minutes of purposeful physical activity into every day.

At work:
• Walk 15 minutes to a meeting instead of driving.
• Take the stairs part way instead of the elevator.
• Get off the bus or subway a few stops earlier and walk.
• Drive part way to work and cycle the rest of the way.

At home:
• Do crunches on all the commercial breaks while you watch your favourite show.
• Go for a walk after dinner.
• Do jumping jacks as you wait for the kettle to boil.
• If you already walk your dog, add hills.
• Do walking lunges down the hallway.
• Run up the stairs. Chase your kids if you have to.

3. Make healthy food choices most of the time
If you want better energy, choose to make a few smart changes with your eating habits every day. Even if you hold on to some of your favourite foods, you can make big strides through bite-sized improvements.
Here are a few ideas to get you started:
• If eating out is hard to avoid, pack healthy snacks for between meals.
• Down-size your full-whip super large mocha to a medium non-fat latte with chocolate sprinkles.
• Cut your portion sizes just a bit.
• Eat breakfast – even just a few days of the week.
• Be cautious of the little nibbles you sneak here and there.
• Choose healthy late night snacks.
• Skip the vending machine.
• Add in fruits and veggies.
• Trim the fat.

Food is fuel for functionality. Regular, healthful eating helps you think clearly through the day, keeps energy levels up and even assists with weight management and health issues. Learn to enjoy your food, and know that healthful eating can still be delicious and satisfying.

4. Stay hydrated!
Why is water so darn important? Did you know your body is made up of approximately 50 percent of the stuff? Your body needs fluids to help with the digestion, absorption and transport of nutrients as well as elimination of waste products. Fluids also act as a coolant for maintaining body temperature and lubricating joints, eyes and air passages. If you consider that 75 percent of North Americans are chronically dehydrated, then the simple act of drinking more water will make a big, big difference to your energy.

Drink water regularly to satisfy your thirst. Be sure to drink more water in hot weather or when you are very active. Besides water, you can count other fluids such as juice, milk and tea toward your daily fluid intake, but be aware of the extra calories as you do.

5. Get enough rest
Since when did sleep become a luxury? While you sleep, your body restores itself and repairs from the stress of the day. Inadequate rest impairs your ability to think, to handle stress, to maintain a healthy immune system and to moderate your emotions. Most of us aren't getting enough of it and we've become a nation of working tired holding on for dear life, hoping to make it to the weekend. Why not make your rest a priority for a few weeks and see how you feel?

Here's how:
• Get to bed 30 minutes earlier at least three times a week.
• Wind down your busy work at least two hours before bed.
• Before bed, avoid computer, television, video games and work related phone calls that stimulate the mind and make it difficult to relax.
• Do your best to stick to the same sleep schedule.
• If you have trouble getting to sleep, try slow, deep breathing or relaxation techniques like stretching or meditation to calm your mind.

6. Stress less for success
In the early 70s when stress expert Eli Bay opened the Relaxation Response Institute in Toronto, Canada, he said that if you looked in the yellow pages under stress all you found were engineering companies. At the time the concept of physical and psychological stress was in its infancy.

Today, if you were to do a simple Internet search with the word stress you'd get in excess of 540 million hits all related to stress management the way we understand it today.

Times have changed. We're connected 24/7, we work longer hours with less sleep and physical activity, we don't eat as well and it's taking its toll on our stress levels and overall health.

Stress is something that we're so used to that it doesn't occur to us that we could live without it, or at least live with less. If stress is present even in small does, it will negatively impact your energy and eventually affect your health. Of course stress is usually the result of a busy life and if you're busy you probably don't have time to deal with your stress.

7. Seek happiness
Happiness has a direct link to a rich source of energy that no amount of exercise or healthy eating can match. It's true! Happiness is a big part of staying energized.

It seems like such a simple thing, but when life gets busy we sometimes just cruise along and accept what is handed us and then one day we wake up and think: this is not what I signed on for.

Do you like your work? Do you love the people you spend time with? Do you wake up and look forward to launching into the day? If any part of your life makes you unhappy, you'll expend unnecessary energy dealing with that pain–energy that could be used to advance your health, career and overall satisfaction.

Face up to things in your life that make you unhappy. It's not always easy and the fix may not be quick, but the results will be very worthwhile.

8. Be kind to others
Imagine a world where everyone is just a little kinder. When you're trying to merge into traffic, someone lets you in. When shopping, you allow a person in a hurry to go ahead of you in the checkout line. You get back to your car and find someone has put money in the parking meter.

Rushing breakneck through our day, we so often forget that how we relate to ourselves and others is much more important than the things we do. Much of the time we hurry through activities so focused on the outcome that we miss the life-affirming interactions along the way. Begin your own kindness campaign by engaging in one small intentional act of kindness every day.

Why? Research shows kindness makes us happier and healthier. People who perform random acts of kindness report being happier, and when the acts are varied—holding the door open for a stranger, helping someone with directions, doing a roommate's dishes—those happy feelings last longer than if you were to perform one act of kindness repeatedly.

Beyond happy feelings, kindness is good for your health. Those who regularly help people have better mental health and lower rates of depression, and tend to have better immune systems. Kindness can also help regulate emotions, which has a positive impact on our health.

Go through your day with an openness to kindness. Walk with your head up and eyes open. Connect with people. Look for opportunities to engage and help. One small kind act a day is good for your health!

9. Embrace your passionEnergy comes from doing things you love. Hours pass like minutes when you’re engaged in tasks you’re passionate about. What ?res you up? Artistic pursuits, sports, outdoor activities, time spent with family and friends, travel, photography, building things? What does it for you?

If you’re not spending at least part of your week in the pursuit of your passions, you’re missing out on a limitless energy source. Begin by thinking back to the things you used to do that brought you joy. Next, think about the things you look forward to doing down the line when you have more time and energy. In this instant take a few small steps toward bringing past and future to the present.

10. Exercise good judgement every day
Change is challenging. And in the busy day-to-day rollercoaster ride that is life, the status quo — or what we already know — is vastly easier to wrap our heads around. When fatigue and stress are high we default to what is familiar out of habit or laziness or lack of awareness. When fatigued we more likely default to the sofa instead of the gym. When we’re stressed we most often default to comfort foods over healthier options. When work gets busy we regularly default to task management over business or career development.

In the new plan, next time is now. Be aware of every in-an-instant decision you make that will bring you closer to more energy now. Start today. Keep at it! Do it for yourself!


Excerpted from Energy Now! Small Steps to an Energetic Life, Michelle Cederberg 

Love your Life

How to Save Money on Gift Giving

I’m a sucker for the holidays. Heading into the season last year, I was more determined than ever to make it count: It would be my first Christmas in our new home, and my first as a new mom. I could have rationalized why this was the year I should make a splash, despite all the spending restraint I had displayed during the rest of the year. Luckily, I remembered a simple mantra: The happiest people don’t have the best of everything; they make the best of everything.

Before I got financially responsible along with my circle of close friends (we eventually became the Smart Cookies), I would spend about $1,500 for holiday gifts—money I didn’t have. But last November, my husband and I set a gift budget of $250. Then we drew names with our family and friends, rather than having to buy for everyone—a stark contrast from past years spent frantically buying for a laundry list of people.
Use credit card points

In my family, I drew my dad’s name, and enjoyed deliberating over ideas. He’s a keen cook, and I’m proud to say I got him an incredible Japanese knife that he still talks about and uses almost daily. I got this for him through rewards points attached to my American Express charge card. Yes, there are downfalls to reward-heavy credit cards; I believe if you carry a balance on your credit card, the benefit of “earning points” does not compensate for the interest you’ll pay. However, it’s estimated more than two million Canadians have access to a card that offers a redeemable reward. So why not use them—wisely? My charge card has one of the best rewards programs I’ve seen. By charging most of my household expenses (gas, groceries, etc.) to it and paying it off monthly, I have some $500 worth of gifts I can redeem by the end of the year. This was how I was able to get my husband an iPad for free.

As for my circle of friends, I drew the name of one who loves unique jewellery. I found her a beautiful, custom-made necklace for $35 on etsy.com. The rest of my shopping was for my baby daughter, though I didn’t spend much on her—a cardboard box still keeps her entertained—and a few small items for colleagues and hosts.
Use online budgeting tools

When it comes to budgeting for the season, don’t bother creating spreadsheets you’ll never use again. But you should create a budget. Try an online tool; my husband and I monitor our spending through a free one at mint.com. It can aggregate all the cards and accounts you use, and categorize where your money is going.

Mint can also text and email you when your spending reaches its maximum in various categories. We were impressed at how helpful these were in keeping us to our $250 gift budget.
Create homemade gifts

This is a social season, and showing up empty-handed to a party just doesn’t feel right. My new go-to gift is a $9 bottle of Hardy’s Gewürztraminer-Riesling, which I personalize by covering the label and writing on it a festive message—for example, “’Tis the Season for Riesling—Love, the Reiachs” (Reiach is my married name). I accompany this with some framed homemade art. I find images of vintage bicycles, Ferris wheels or birds online and print them onto a heavy paper stock.

I ended up spending just $230 on gifts, not $250. I felt less stressed, and more empowered and delighted by the memories we made than in years past. Here’s wishing you a memorable holiday season that is free of a spending hangover.

 

 

Love your Life

source : googling

What is Heart Disease?

The basic mechanism of heart disease is a buildup of cholesterol-laden plaque (a fatty deposit) inside the coronary arteries, the blood vessels that carry oxygen-rich blood to the heart. Plaque narrows the inner channel of the vessels and makes them less flexible. This process is called atherosclerosis, or hardening of the arteries. As normal blood flow to your heart is restricted, you may experience angina (chest pain). If a clot forms or lodges inside a narrowed artery, it can completely cut off blood flow and cause a heart attack. Heart disease is often “silent”—producing no symptoms—until it causes a heart attack.

Who is at risk for heart disease?

Both your genes and your lifestyle habits contribute to heart disease. To calculate your risk, give yourself 1 point for each of the following risk factors:

What you can't control

• Age. Over age 55 for women.
• Gender. Men are more vulnerable to heart disease than women.
• Postmenopausal status. Women’s risk increases sharply after menopause.
• Family history of heart disease.
• Personal history of a heart attack.
• Ethnicity – people of African, Latin American, or Asian descent.

What you can control

• Smoking or regular exposure to second-hand smoke.
• Low-density lipoprotein, or LDL (“bad” cholesterol), above 4.2 mmol/L.
• High-density lipoprotein, or HDL, below 0.9 mmol/L.
• High blood pressure (over 140/90 mmHg).
• High triglyceride level (over 5.2 mmol/L).
• Diabetes.
• Chronic stress or depression.
• Physical inactivity.
• Obesity.
• High intake of saturated fat.
• Low intake of heart-smart foods.

Subtract 1 point if you have high levels of HDL cholesterol (over 0.9 mmol/L). Then add up your total score. A score of 0 to 2 points puts you at low to moderate risk of heart disease. A score of 3 or more points means you’re at high risk. See your doctor now for an evaluation. And start making some lifestyle changes. 

Love your Life

source : besthealthmag

Optimism For Pessimists

Stranger things have happened.

This is one of my favorite things to say.

It’s hopeful, but not giddy. Cautiously optimistic. Optimism for pessimists.

It’s a shrug of the shoulders, a little bit superstitious. You don’t want to be too confident but, you know…it could happen. Stranger things have.

And almost no matter what you’re talking about, it’s true. All kinds of strange stuff happens every day, so unless you’re talking about the Rapture, there’s a good chance that something stranger than whatever is under discussion has happened at some point in time.

It’s a version of “anything can happen,” but with shadowy images of all kinds of stranger things that have actually happened. You might pause a moment, to try to think of things that would be stranger than whatever event is under discussion. It’s also a version of “miracles happen,” but a lot darker.  It’s not talking miraculous. It’s talking strange.

“Stranger things have happened” is full of possibilities. Might I make a million dollars on my new book? Stranger things have happened. Might Jon Stewart invite me to be on the Daily Show? Stranger things have happened. Or maybe it will be Stephen Colbert. Stranger things have happened. This, for example.

“Stranger things can happen” is like the Magic 8 Ball. Or newspaper horoscopes. It’s vague and nonspecific, so it’s deliciously all purpose and gives you something to dream on without making any promises.

Maybe you’ll run out and buy my new book when it hits stores on Tuesday. You never know. Stranger things have happened.


Love your Life
source : googling 

Success Lead to Happiness?

It’s an age-old assumption: Success, whether in school, work or relationships, causes happiness. Many of us strive for success, putting long hours into our work or studies in the hopes of achieving success and, as a byproduct of that success, happiness.

But a review of 225 studies in the Psychological Bulletin found that happiness doesn’t necessarily follow success. In fact, it’s just the opposite. Happiness leads to success.

According to the study’s findings, happy people seek out and undertake new goals that reinforce their happiness and other positive emotions.

Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ph.D., of the University of California, Riverside and colleagues reviewed three types of studies: those that compare different groups of people, those that follow individuals over time and those that examine outcomes in controlled settings.

These studies examined questions such as “Are happy people more successful than unhappy people? Does happiness precede success? And does positive affect lead to success-oriented behaviors?”

The results from all three types of studies suggest that happiness leads to greater successes in life.  Lyubomirsky suggests “this may be because happy people frequently experience positive moods and these positive moods prompt them to be more likely to work actively toward new goals and build new resources. When people feel happy, they tend to feel confident, optimistic, and energetic and others find them likable and sociable.”

This doesn’t mean that happy people are always successful and never feel sad.  Part of a healthy sense of well-being includes experiencing painful emotions in response to difficult and painful life circumstances.  These studies found that even generally happy people experienced negative emotions related to challenging or painful life experiences.

Other factors also contribute to success, including intelligence, fitness, social support and expertise.  But Lyubomirsky says, “happy individuals are more likely than their less happy peers to have fulfilling marriages and relationships, high incomes, superior work performance, community involvement, robust health and even a long life.”
Strategies for Greater Happiness

So how can you become happier?

In another review of studies on happiness, looking at 51 studies that tested attempts to increase happiness through different types of positive thinking, Lyubomirsky identified some key ways to improve happiness.

Be grateful.

People reported happiness that lasted for weeks and months after writing letters (they don’t even have to be sent) of gratitude to others.

Be optimistic.

Visualizing positive circumstances and outcomes increased happiness for study participants.

Count your blessings.

People who wrote three positive things that had happened to them each week found their spirits lifted.

Use your strengths.

Identifying strengths and making a commitment to try to use them in new ways appeared to enhance happiness in one study’s participants.

Act kindly.

People who help others report that it also helps their own sense of well-being.


Love your Life
source : googling 

Love Is

Love can be confusing. Do we merely love someone or are we “in love” with them, and what do all of these terms mean anyway?

Many of us believe that loving someone means holding them dear, while being in love means passion, excitement, and true understanding of a person’s heart and soul. Being “in love” perhaps signifies a commitment that we wish to make to one person. What will happen, however, when the passion and excitement starts to fade; when we are steeped in the daily stress of living and life? Do we simply move on to the next person to find more passion and more excitement?

If we are to fully commit our lives to our romantic partner, we may want to entertain the notion that there is in fact no difference between loving and being in love. Love, as in all other things, has its ups and downs. A firm decision to face the inevitable challenges together with our partner will allow us to enjoy the rewards of romantic love as we go through life together.

When we find a partner, we initially “talk the talk” and say we love them and will always be there for them, but are we going into this relationship with an honest, open heart?

Often times we have been damaged by an important relationship at some point in our lives that leaves us vowing never to open ourselves to such hurt again. So we put up an isolating wall that does not allow anyone to get close to our deepest emotions. This grand scheme can backfire however, because while we are attempting to keep new pain out, we are also holding old pain in.

Our journey to healing does not have to be traveled alone. When we allow the isolating wall to come down and ask our partner to be part of our healing process, we are learning how to give and receive unconditional love.

If we truly love someone, it should never have strings attached. “Conditional love” is not really love at all – it is someone’s underhanded way of getting you to do what they want. Dangling the carrot of being loved is a control measure that keeps you trying to succeed at something that can never be achieved – receiving true, unconditional love.

If your father cried that he loved you as he beat you, or you mother told you, as she was locking you in your room, that it hurt her more than it hurt you, you were not receiving love. True love has no conditions but to give it or accept it.

“Til death do us part” seems out of sync with today’s divorce rate. Perhaps it should be altered to say, “til death – or disillusionment – do us part.” It seems that we are all too willing to trade in our partner for a newer model when life is not going the way we envisioned it. This may be due to the fact that the very foundation upon which the relationship is built is made of sand. (This is but one reason that the various 12-step fellowships ask newly recovering members to refrain from starting any new relationships in the first months of recovery.)

We all know the pain of loving someone who does not love us back. It makes little difference whether we discover that we are in “conditional love” at the beginning or at the end of a relationship. It does not matter. It hurts, and it can cause us to turn back inward, put back up our isolating walls, and try to find what it is about ourselves that we cannot be loved in return.

This preoccupation with one person’s rejection can cause us to lose sight of all the others who do in fact love us. This preoccupation with one person’s rejection can cause us to diminish our self-worth.

In a successful partnership, we are part of the solution or part of the problem. True love will actually increase our self-worth. If we, as partners, cannot accomplish this for each other, then we are either not allowing ourselves to see the self-worth in each other, or we are not allowing ourselves to share with our partner about the self-worth that we do see. Let us strive to be the solution.

If a couple takes the time to know each other deeply, openly, and spiritually, they will begin with a strong foundation on which to build their lives together.

Love your Live

source : googling

Positive Thinking in Difficult Times

It is rather easier to feel positive when everything goes well, but real positive thinking is revealed when you can maintain it difficult times. It is then that you need it most.

In difficult times, when there are problems and the economic condition is tough, it is so easy to get into negative thinking and self-pity, and be sucked into a vicious circle of worries, fears and the expectation of more problems, lack of money or poverty.

You may read books and articles on positive thinking, and believe that you are positive, but when difficulties and rough times appear, you just forget everything and focus on the problems and difficulties, instead of believing in yourself, looking for solutions and seeking and seizing opportunities.

If you have no job, no money and the future looks bleak you might:

• Indulge in self-pity and feel bad and helpless.
• Indulge in worries and fears and expect more problems.
• Become resentful and angry at the world and at successful people.
• Be sad and focus on your problems.

Does this attitude help you in anything? No, it will only get you deeper into problems, because when you see and expect problems you create more problems. This is where positive thinking and positive attitude are required. It is true, it is not so easy to reject negative thinking in such circumstances, and even if you try, you might find yourself again and again reverting to negative thinking and dwelling on your problems.

If you have lost your way in a forest, will thoughts about your predicament help you? If you just sit down on a rock, and think and imagine that you will never find your way out help you in any way?

If you have failed, lost money or your job, will thinking how bad your condition is help you find a new job or earn money?

Wherever you are now, whatever your situation is, there is always a way out. This might require a different way of thinking, a different approach or developing new skills. Forget the past, as you cannot change it, but you can change your present, and when you change your present, you also change your future.

Keeping a positive attitude, expecting the best, striving to do the best and refusing to indulge in self-pity, negative thinking and worries is the road to a better and happier life.

Love your Life

source : googling

Positive Thinking

Positive thinking brings inner peace, success, improved relationships, better health, happiness and satisfaction. It also helps the daily affairs of life move more smoothly, and makes life look bright and promising.

Positive thinking is contagious. People around you pick your mental moods and are affected accordingly. Think about happiness, good health and success, and you will cause people to like you and desire to help you, because they enjoy the vibrations that a positive mind emits.

In order to make positive thinking yield results, you need to develop a positive attitude toward life, expect a successful outcome of whatever you do, but also take any necessary actions to ensure your success.

Effective positive thinking that brings results is much more than just repeating a few positive words, or telling yourself that everything is going to be all right. It has to be your predominant mental attitude. It is not enough to think positively for a few moments, and then letting fears and lack of belief enter your mind. Some effort and inner work are necessary.

Are you willing to make a real inner change?
Are you willing to change the way you think?
Are you willing to develop a mental power that can positively affect you, your environment and the people around you?

Here are a few actions and tips to help you develop the power of positive thinking:

• Always use only positive words while thinking and while talking. Use words such as, 'I can', 'I am able', 'it is possible', 'it can be done', etc.
• Allow into your awareness only feelings of happiness, strength and success.
• Try to disregard and ignore negative thoughts. Refuse to think such thoughts, and substitute them with constructive happy thoughts.
• In your conversation use words that evoke feelings and mental images of strength, happiness and success.
• Before starting with any plan or action, visualize clearly in your mind its successful outcome. If you visualize with concentration and faith, you will be amazed at the results.
• Read at least one page of inspiring book every day.
• Watch movies that make you feel happy.
• Minimize the time you listen to the news and read the papers.
• Associate yourself with people who think positively.
• Always sit and walk with your back straight. This will strengthen your confidence and inner strength.
• Walk, swim or engage in some other physical activity. This helps to develop a more positive attitude.

Think positive and expect only favorable results and situations, even if your current circumstances are not as you wish them to be. In time, your mental attitude will affect your life and circumstances and change them accordingly.

Love your Life

source : googling

The Key Is

What do you think is key to becoming successful later in life? Good grades? A high school or college degree? Knowledge or skill necessary for a particular job? Critical thinking? IQ?

As markers of success, researchers often look at performance in school, completion of degrees, ability to maintain employment, earning a livable income, refraining from illegal drug use and not divorcing.

In America today, the emphasis tends to be on cognitive achievement. Success in life, we so often believe, comes with knowledge and skills.

But intellectual skill is only one small factor that contributes to success in life. So what are the keys to success in life?

According to a recent article in the Wall Street Journal, psychologists, neuroscientists, economists and educators have been studying factors that contribute to success and have been producing evidence that intellect is not central to life success.

James Heckman, an economist at the University of Chicago who in 2000 won the Nobel Prize for economics, has investigated the question of success. Mr. Heckman has convened conferences of economists and psychologists to understand certain questions: Which skills and traits lead to success? How do they develop in childhood? And what kind of interventions might help children do better?

As the answers to these questions emerge, the evidence points not to intellectual ability as central to life success, but to non-cognitive skills. These non-cognitive skills — in other words, personality traits — appear to impact life success more than we have typically assumed.

Yes, what you know is important. And training and skill level on a job do contribute to success at that job. But other qualities such as persistence, self-control, conscientiousness, self-confidence and curiosity matter, perhaps more.

Like knowledge, these personality traits can be developed, but unlike knowledge that is taught in class or book, they come from life experience. Most of the qualities that contribute to overall life success come from our experiences with adversity. Facing difficult challenges and overcoming them builds self-confidence, teaches self-control and tends to foster an attitude of conscientiousness towards others, who may also face difficulties.

Problems in developing these traits occur when individuals are over protected and rarely face real challenges or when an individual or child is faced with overwhelming adversity or significant life challenges over which they have no control. Abuse or experiencing multiple crisis that occur one after the next without time for recovery are two examples of overwhelming adversity that can impact those personality traits connected with life success.

Fostering these personality traits, therefore, is complex. We must allow those we love a degree of failure, so they can learn to overcome life’s challenges. Even those who have experienced overwhelming adversity must come to trust themselves and their ability to succeed when faced with setbacks.

Confidence, courage and persistence are learned when we struggle. The challenge is to allow ourselves and others to struggle, in order to learn persistence and self-trust, while remaining aware that too much adversity can also erode a sense of self.

Love your Life

source : googling

Living Life Without Struggle

Living life without struggle is about changing your perception of what life is. Life is really not a battleground of endless moments to survive or fight your way through. There is not always another obstacle to struggle against. Sometimes we live our lives like this; always seeing what comes next as another moment to fight against. Life can feel this way, but it can also feel like it flows without struggle. Life can be either way for you, depending on how you perceive it. If moments feel hard, how much harder are we making them when we view it as a struggle or something we are up against?

There can be times when we make the situation much worse than it really is because we are focusing on what is hard. If all we see is the obstacle and the struggle, then of course that is how we will live. If we were to stand back and take in the whole moment for what it really is, would it feel so overwhelmingly hard? Perhaps we could get a clearer picture of the truth if we tried not to compare it to our struggles in the past. In our haste to create every moment as a struggle, we can be reliving old battles. For if we are comparing the present to a hard moment from the past, then we struggle against it in the same way.

Our perception of any moment correlates with how we feel and act. Struggle is not seeing the moment for what it really is. If we could open up to seeing the moment as it is, not from an emotional place or from memory, we could relate to it more clearly. When we are clear, the moment will feel less hard. Try not to compare the present to any old struggles you have had. Try not to emotionally fight against what is happening, and instead accept it. Struggle is a way of fighting life.

Accept life; accept where you are and every moment you are in, and the feeling of struggle will fall away. You will be living from a place that no longer seeks to struggle. Instead, you will be in the moment and seeing it for what it really is. Life will then be easier, lighter, and more fun because you have stopped seeing it as something to fight against. We can always live any new moment as a struggle or we can see it for what it is. Try not to create struggle in life just because you always have. Instead, create acceptance in your life and you will be living without struggle.


Love Your Life
source : googling

28 Ways Stop to Start Simple Life

Life is not complicated.  We are complicated.  When we stop doing the wrong things and start doing the right things, life is simple.
 So starting today…

1. Stop berating yourself for being a work in progress. – Start embracing it!  Because being a work in progress doesn’t mean you’re not good enough today.  It means you want a better tomorrow, and you wish to love yourself completely, so you can live your life fully.  It means you’re determined to heal your heart, expand your mind and cultivate the gifts you know you’re meant to share. May we all be works in progress forever, and celebrate the fact that we are!   
2. Stop doing immoral things simply because you can. – Start being honest with yourself and everyone else.  Don’t cheat.  Be faithful.  Be kind.  Do the right thing!  It is a less complicated way to live.  Integrity is the essence of everything successful.  When you break the rules of integrity you invite serious complications into your life.  Keep life simple and enjoyable by doing what you know in your heart is right.   
3. Stop meaning what you don’t say. – Start communicating clearly.  Don’t try to read other people’s minds, and don’t make other people try to read yours.  Most problems, big and small, within a family, friendship, or business relationship, start with bad communication.  Someone isn’t being clear.   
4. Stop wasting time and money trying to acquire more of everything. – Start focusing on quality.  High quality is worth more than any quantity, in possessions, friends and experiences.  Truly ‘rich’ people need less to be happy.  Live a comfortable life, not a wasteful one.  Too many people buy things they don’t need with money they don’t have to impress people they don’t know.  Do not spend to impress others.  Do not live life trying to fool yourself into thinking wealth is measured in material objects.  Manage your money wisely so your money does not manage you.   
5. Stop spending time with negative people. – Start spending time with nice people who are smart, driven and likeminded.  Relationships should help you, not hurt you.  Surround yourself with people who reflect the person you want to be.  Choose friends who you are proud to know, people you admire, who love and respect you – people who make your day a little brighter simply by being in it.  Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.  When you free yourself of negative people, you free yourself to be YOU – and being YOU is the simplest way to live.   
6. Stop trying to change people. – Start accepting people just the way they are.  In most cases it’s impossible to change them anyway, and it’s rude to try.  So save yourself from needless stress.  Instead of trying to change others, give them your support and lead by example.   
7. Stop being lazy and cutting corners. – Start avoiding future headaches by doing things right the first time.  Always put your best foot forward.  Doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.  Why give less than 100%?  Life is too short to waste it by living below your full potential.  If something is worth doing, then it’s worth doing well.    
8. Stop procrastinating. – Start taking action and making changes.  Action and change are often resisted when they’re needed most.  Get a hold of yourself and have discipline.  Discipline is choosing what you really want over what you want right now.  Putting something off makes it instantly harder and scarier.  What we don’t start today won’t be finished by tomorrow.  And there’s nothing more stressful than the perpetual lingering of an unfinished task.
9. Stop worrying and complaining. – Start focusing on the things you can control and do something about them.  Those who complain the most accomplish the least.  And when you spend time worrying, you’re simply using your imagination to create things you don’t want.  It’s usually only as good or bad as you think it is.
10. Stop being dramatic. – Start spending less time gossiping about problems and more time helping yourself and others solve them.  Stay out of people’s needless drama and don’t create your own.
11. Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Start focusing on being everything to someone.  Helping or pleasing everyone is impossible.  But making one person smile can change the world.  Maybe not the whole world, but their world.  So narrow your focus and be yourself.
12. Stop making promises you can’t keep. – Starting under-promising and over-delivering on everything you do.  Period.
13. Stop blaming others. – Start accepting responsibility for everything in your life.  Blaming others accomplishes nothing and prolongs the complications you’re facing.  Either you own your problems, or they will own you.  Your choice.  When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give up your power over that part of your life.
14. Stop reacting without a plan. – Start planning and working toward specific goals.  Make a list of your top 3 - 5 goals.  What’s most important to you?  What do you value most?  What 3 - 5 things do you most want to do in your life?  Simplifying your life starts with these priorities, as you are trying to make room in your life so you have more time for these things.  Having a plan, even a flawed one at first, is better than no plan at all.  There is good reason why you should wake each morning and mindfully consider what and who you will give your day to: Because unlike other things in life – love, money, respect, good health, hope, opportunities, etc. – time is the one thing you can never get back once it’s gone.
15. Stop confusing ‘being busy’ with ‘being productive.’ – Start tracking and measuring your progress.  Being busy and being productive are two very different things.  Results are more important than the time it takes to achieve them.
16. Stop over-committing and trying to do too much at once. – Start saying “no” more often.  If you never say “no,” you will take on too much and get nothing accomplished.  In the beginning, you need to say “yes” to a lot of things to discover and establish your goals.  Later on, you need to say “no” to a lot of things and concentrate on your goals.  Once your goals are established, focus on doing one thing at a time and doing it well.  Also, leave space around commitments in your day. Whether you have appointments, or things you need to do, don’t stack them back-to-back.  Leave a little space between things you need to do, so you will have room for contingencies, and you’ll go through your day much more relaxed.
17. Stop being inefficient simply because you’ve always done it that way. – Start opening your mind to making positive changes.  If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.  Many times we live with unplanned, complex systems in our lives simply because we haven’t given them much thought.  Instead, streamline your life by finding better ways of handling common tasks.  Focus on one system at a time (your cleaning system, your errands system, your paperwork system, your email system, etc.) and try to make it simplified, efficient, and logical.  Then, once you have it perfected, stick to it.  
18. Stop cluttering your space. – Start clearing clutter.  Get rid of stuff you don’t use and then organize what’s left.  If you have a cluttered living or working space, it can be distracting and stressful.  A clear space is like a blank canvas, available to be used to create something great.  Getting truly organized and clutter-free can vastly improve anyone’s life.
19. Stop overloading your mind by consuming useless information. – Start unsubscribing from useless e-lists and news feeds, and keep the TV off.  Limit your time on Facebook, Twitter, CNN.com and your other favorite websites, etc.
20. Stop obsessing over the past and future. – Start being present. Paying more attention to the current moment can make a huge difference in simplifying your life.  It keeps you aware of life, of what’s going on around you and within you.  It does wonders for your sanity and stress levels.
21. Stop waiting for things to be perfect. – Start thinking of how many things don’t get done in this world simply because people are waiting for the perfect time, place and circumstance.  If you’re waiting for the perfect conditions, ideas or plans to get started, you’ll never achieve anything.  A good idea without action is nothing at all.  Keep it simple and just start.  Focus on the next positive step forward.
22. Stop focusing so much energy on trying to avoid mistakes. – Start learning from your mistakes, then smile and move on.  No matter how smart you are, you will make mistakes.  Trying to avoid them will only waste time and complicate your life.  There is a lesson in every mistake you make, and learning the lesson is how you move forward.
23. Stop making emotional decisions. – Start taking a few steps back so you can think things through.  When you’re caught up in the moment and your emotions are soaring, you’re bound to make poor decisions that will lead to needless complications.  The best advice here is simple:  Don’t let your emotions trump your intelligence.  Slow down and think things through before you make any big decisions.
24. Stop being unhealthy. – Start taking care of your body.  Start sleeping eight hours every night.  A tired, malnourished mind is over-stressed and rarely productive.  Your health is your life, don’t let it go.  Eat right, exercise and get an annual physical check-up.  The The 4-Hour Body is an insightful and entertaining read on this topic.
25. Stop holding on to intimate relationships that make you unhappy. – Start looking out for yourself when it comes to intimate relationships.  It’s better to WAIT, and give your hand to someone who will never let go, rather than holding on to the outside of a hand that has never fully opened for you.  If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you.  You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot.  Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth.  Remember, anyone can come into your life and say how much they love you.  But it takes someone really special to stay in your life and show you how much they love you.  So slow it down.  True love is worth the wait.
26. Stop holding on to hate. – Start letting hate go!  Keep your sights set on the future.  Holding on to hate and anger is like grasping hot coals with the intent of throwing them at someone else – you are the one who gets burned.  If you want to forget someone, and move on, you must give up hating them.  It’s hard to forget someone you hate, because hate takes pieces of your heart – thereby keeping this person within your heart.  If you want to forget them, let go of the hate, and create peace in your heart instead.  Also, remember that whenever you hate something, it usually hates you back: people, situations, and inanimate objects alike; which will only further complicate your life.
27. Stop pretending like you know everything. – Start accepting the fact that there’s a lot you don’t know.  Nobody has it all figured out.  Nobody knows more than a minuscule fraction of what’s going on in the world.  Why?  Because the world is simply way too vast for any one person to know everything well.  And most of what we see is only what we think about what we see.  The sooner you accept this, the sooner you will stop making the same unnecessary mistakes, and the sooner new doors of opportunity will open in your life.
28. Stop giving what you don’t want to receive. – Start practicing the golden rule.  If you want love, give love.  If you want friends, be friendly.  If you want money, provide value.  It works.  It really is this simple.

   
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Love Your Life
source : googling