Quotes That Will Free Your Mind

If you truly want to change your life, you must first change your mind.  You must free it from the restrictive thinking that holds you back.Here are 50 thought-provoking quotes gathered from site Everyday Life Lessons, and from our blog archive that will help tweak your thinking and set your mind free.

1. You are only destined to become one person – the person you decide to be.
2. Do good and feel good.  Do bad and feel bad.  It’s that simple.
3. You are what you do today, not what you say you’ll do tomorrow.
4. We all make choices, but in the end our choices make us.
5. Ultimately, it’s not what you do every once in a while; it’s what you dedicate yourself to on a regular basis that makes the difference.
6. Stay true to yourself.  Never be ashamed of doing what feels right.  Decide what you think is right and stick to it.
7. If you don’t stand for anything, you will remain forever on your knees.
8. No amount of money will make you happy if you aren’t happy with yourself.
9. You know you’ve made the right decision when there is peace in your heart.
10. Don’t worry if your goals seem crazy to other people; oftentimes the crazy ideas are the ones that have the greatest impact.
11. If you’re thinking like everyone else, then you aren’t thinking. 
12. Control your own destiny or someone else will try for you.
13. Sometimes standing up to your friends can be just as difficult as standing up to your enemies.
14. The unhappiest people in this world are the people who care the most about what everyone else thinks.
15. When people undermine your dreams, predict your doom, or criticize you, remember, they’re telling you their story, not yours.
16. There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally.
17. No one in the world was ever you before, with your particular gifts and abilities and possibilities.
18. Your greatest task isn’t to find love, but to discover and destroy all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
19. A loving, happy person lives in a loving, happy world.  A hateful, miserable person lives in a hateful, miserable world.  The world around you reflects YOU.
20. Worry gives small things a big shadow.
21. Focus your conscious mind on things you desire not things you fear.  Doing so brings dreams to life.
22. It’s not the mistakes and failures you have to worry about, it’s the opportunities you miss when you don’t even try that hurt the most.
23. It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one over and over again.
24. To get something you’ve never had, you must do something you’ve never done.
25. The harder thing to do and the right thing to do are usually the same thing.
26. Our problems are really our blessings if we use them to grow stronger. 
27. Anyone can run away; it’s super easy.  Facing problems and working through them, that’s what makes you strong.
28. When you have two good options, always go with the one that scares you the most, because that’s the one that’s going to help you grow.
29. Courage is being scared to death, and then taking the next step anyway.
30. Sometimes our greatest insight comes from our failure, not from our accomplishments.
31. You need to screw up to learn.  You need to experience it all to create greatness.
32. Just because you don’t understand something now doesn’t mean the explanation doesn’t exist.
33. Not knowing everything about your future is a good thing.
34. Don’t worry about what you can’t control and you may liberate yourself.
35. People of average ability often achieve outstanding success because they don’t know when to quit.  Most people succeed simply because they are determined to.
36. Temporary happiness isn’t worth long-term pain.
37. Patience can be bitter, but the seeds you plant now will bear sweet fruit.
38. The less you expect, the more pleasant life gets.
39. The more you are in a state of gratitude, the more you will attract things to be grateful for.
40. The things you take for granted, someone else is praying for.
41. It usually isn’t what you have or where you are or what you’re doing that makes you happy.  It’s how you think about it all.
42. Do not dwell so much on creating your perfect life that you forget to live.
43. You are not in competition with anybody except yourself; plan to outdo your past not other people.
44. To admit that you were wrong is to declare that you are wiser now than you were before.
45. Humans see what they want to see.
46. If you spend too much time judging yourself, you won’t have any time to love yourself or anyone else.  
47. At the end of the day, you can either focus on what’s tearing you apart or what’s holding you together.
48. Look through the front windshield and not the rearview mirror.
49. You don’t get to choose how you are going to die, or when.  But you can choose how you are going to live, right now.
50. Be done with regrets; they are an excuse for people who have failed.  You still have a chance.

Health Benefits of Love

Ain't love grand? It's fulfilling, exciting and, as it turns out, good for you, too. We spoke to experts and found out that romance can bring you more than just giddiness—it can also positively affect your health and well-being. So whether you've been married for years or are single and looking, the following evidence will remind you why it's important to make room for love in your life.

It may bolster your immune system.
Research suggests that happy couples who engage in positive conflict resolution have higher functioning immune systems than those who don't, says Gian Gonzaga, MD, senior director of research & development at eHarmony Labs. He points to a study by Ronald Glazer and Jan Kiecolt-Glaser, in which couples were observed during disputes. The couples who displayed the most negative behavior during the fights also showed the largest decline in immediate immune system functioning. Those who argued in a more loving, positive way had higher immediate immune function. Looking to fight in a healthier way? According to Dr. Gonzaga, the key to positive conflict resolution is productively engaging in the conversation without retreating or "stonewalling" each other.

It can make you physically fit.
No, you don't get to bid your gym membership goodbye. But, it turns out that couples who exercise together have more success than people who sweat solo. According to certified fitness trainer and nutritionist Jay Cardiello, "nearly half of people who exercise alone quit their programs after one year, but two-thirds of those who work out with a loved one stick to it." Even better: Both men and women work between 12 and 15 percent harder when training with a romantic partner. Whether it's the excitement of being together or the extra push to keep up with your partner, sweating à deux clearly has its benefits. To reap the rewards, try scheduling in gym sessions with your honey during a time when you'll both be able to commit, like in the morning or during lunch.

It might help you live longer.
"There's a long history of research that has looked at the health benefits of marriage," says Joseph Hullett, MD, psychiatrist and senior medical director for OptumHealth, Behavioral Solutions. "According to a 2004 study by the CDC, mortality rates were found to be the lowest in married couples." Dr. Hullett attributes these findings to the fact that, generally speaking, people experience less stress when they're in committed, healthy relationships—and less stress means better health. Plus, it has been shown that when men marry they give up some of their risky behavior—like heavy drinking and smoking—which leads to longevity. Good news for your hubby!

It may clear up your skin.
That healthy glow of being in love? It's not just a myth! "When our love life is in order, our stress levels are lower," says Genaise Gerstner, MD, a New York City-based dermatologist. "There is less free-floating cortisol—high cortisol levels cause stress-induced acne––and thus less skin breakouts and pimples."

It can improve your heart heath.
"Human beings are social animals who have biological drives that make them want to find relationships," says Dr. Hullett. "When they can't find those unions, they're punished with stress." People in happy relationships experience less stress, which in turn improves their cardiovascular health. Furthermore, Dr. Hullett says people who aren't in stable, committed relationships have an increased rate of heart attacks, particularly those who have been widowed, giving a graver meaning to the term "heartbroken."

It can reduce feelings of pain.
The comfort of holding your husband's hand can actually minimize your feelings of pain, according to a recent study. "Researchers studied people that experienced electrical shocks and found that holding someone's hand ameliorated the pain and perception of pain," says Dr. Hullett. The most fascinating part? These feelings of pain decreased even more when the female subjects—who were in happy marriages––held their husband's hands. "Yes, friends helped reduce the pain that these subjects were feeling, but their husband did a better job at it."

It can regulate your menstrual cycle.
That is, love––as in making love––can. If you're struggling with irregular periods, try hitting the sheets. Eric Braverman, MD, author of Younger (Sexier) You, points to a study from Planned Parenthood demonstrating that women who have sex at least once a week have higher levels of estrogen and are more likely to have regular menstrual cycles than women who have sex less frequently.

It can improve your mental well-being.
We all know that being in love makes us feel elated, but it's not just in our heads. There actually is scientific evidence of romance's blissful effects on the brain. Dr. Braverman references a study from Rutgers University that found participants, when they looked at photos of people they deeply love, had an increase of dopamine brain activity, which is associated with optimism, energy and a sense of well-being. Talk about being high on love! Helen Fisher, PhD, a biological anthropologist and author of Why Him? Why Her? supports this notion: "The bottom line is, the dopamine rush that comes from being in love gives you tremendous energy and optimism."

Are We Genetically Programmed to Fall in Love?

Valentine’s Day, love songs, romance novels—do they influence falling in love? On the surface it seems like they do, but scientific research suggests that there’s another cupid at work: instinct. Love, specifically the passionate variety, is an emotion that is almost beyond our control. Humans, it seems, are programmed to take this amorous tumble. Forget the roses and heart-shaped box of chocolates—it’s our genes that are on the hook for our addiction to love.

According to Elizabeth Pillsworth, assistant professor of evolutionary anthropology at California State University, passionate love has been around since the dawn of time. “It's hard to say with any great confidence when the emotion of love may have evolved,” says Pillsworth, “but given the fact that we haven't found any human populations in which it seems to be absent, either in modern or historical records, we can assume that [love] is characteristic of humans, like feeling compassion or shame.”

Love is one of our oldest emotions. Our hunting-and-gathering predecessors were just as consumed by it as we are today. Back then, passionate love brought people together for survival, safety and continuation of the species. Today, we might not need a partner to help us stay alive, feel secure, or even have babies, but at the heart of love, the need is the same: the desire to love someone and have that amorous feeling reciprocated. This emotion is universal. It crosses generations, cultures and geographical borders.
Why does love make us do crazy things?

So why does passionate love make us act like we do? Triggered by age-old instincts, modern love has a lot to answer for. "People literally describe spending upwards of 90 percent of their waking energy thinking about the object of their desire, planning ways to inadvertently ‘bump into’ him,” says Pillsworth. We dream about the moment when they tell us they love us back. Passionate love with its first flush of excitement is typically a brief condition. It’s normally restricted to the early stages of a relationship. On the plus side, it’s a very romantic phase, however, it’s also incredibly time-consuming and occasionally verges into obsessive territory—the lovesick behaviour called limerence. “Dorothy Tennov, a social psychologist, coined the term in her 1979 book, Love and Limerence,” says Pillsworth. “[It captured] that aspect of love characterized by intrusive thoughts, emotional roller coasters, desperate desire for deep emotional attachment, and even quasi-stalking behaviours.” Passionate love can make some of us do crazy things, but for the majority it’s a helpful tool.

Take the selection of a mate. Our instincts make us seek out certain traits in a potential significant other. Falling in passionate love is the first step in the process. “In looking for a long-term partner, both [sexes] are most anxious to find someone who is kind, mutually attracted to them, and has a good sense of humour,” says Pillsworth. “Beyond that, men place more emphasis on the physical attractiveness of a long-term partner than women do. Women place more emphasis on the resource-acquiring characteristics of a long-term partner.” These preferences date back to ancient times. Men searched for the curvy, “womanly” body type that signals a healthy mate for child-bearing, while the opposite was true for women. A virile, broad-shouldered male was ideal for a sexual conquest, but not necessarily for a life-long relationship. Women primarily sought providers. Falling in love was a good test to see if the person in question was up to scratch before any further commitment was established. Love today isn’t much different.
Is love meant to last forever?

When the bloom of this initial affection wilts and a strong, but less intense, love takes over, the relationship can hit a turning point. Will it spark a break up, or a lengthy monogamous union? Isn’t monogamy in our genes, too? Scientists remain mixed on the subject. Some research suggests that people in the midst of passionate love seem blind to other attractive individuals. They’re focused on that one potential partner, despite other enticing prospects nearby. Such findings fuel the monogamous point of view, but other studies differ. Contrary evidence indicates that men and women will explore extra sexual and relationship opportunities if given the chance, thus monogamy is just a passing phase. Science has been unable to support either theory completely. What is for certain is that we have an ability to use our instincts in conjunction with our own decision-making processes. “[We] have a highly flexible, responsive mating system,” says Pillsworth. “We take in information about our current circumstances: our age, attractiveness, cultural context, and behave accordingly.” Passionate love with all its benefits—and faults—may be driven more by our minds than our hearts, but at least we’re not alone in acting under its spell. We are all at the mercy of this crazy little thing called love.


Web exclusive, February 2011

Love your Life

Love Is

Love can be confusing. Do we merely love someone or are we “in love” with them, and what do all of these terms mean anyway?

Many of us believe that loving someone means holding them dear, while being in love means passion, excitement, and true understanding of a person’s heart and soul. Being “in love” perhaps signifies a commitment that we wish to make to one person. What will happen, however, when the passion and excitement starts to fade; when we are steeped in the daily stress of living and life? Do we simply move on to the next person to find more passion and more excitement?

If we are to fully commit our lives to our romantic partner, we may want to entertain the notion that there is in fact no difference between loving and being in love. Love, as in all other things, has its ups and downs. A firm decision to face the inevitable challenges together with our partner will allow us to enjoy the rewards of romantic love as we go through life together.

When we find a partner, we initially “talk the talk” and say we love them and will always be there for them, but are we going into this relationship with an honest, open heart?

Often times we have been damaged by an important relationship at some point in our lives that leaves us vowing never to open ourselves to such hurt again. So we put up an isolating wall that does not allow anyone to get close to our deepest emotions. This grand scheme can backfire however, because while we are attempting to keep new pain out, we are also holding old pain in.

Our journey to healing does not have to be traveled alone. When we allow the isolating wall to come down and ask our partner to be part of our healing process, we are learning how to give and receive unconditional love.

If we truly love someone, it should never have strings attached. “Conditional love” is not really love at all – it is someone’s underhanded way of getting you to do what they want. Dangling the carrot of being loved is a control measure that keeps you trying to succeed at something that can never be achieved – receiving true, unconditional love.

If your father cried that he loved you as he beat you, or you mother told you, as she was locking you in your room, that it hurt her more than it hurt you, you were not receiving love. True love has no conditions but to give it or accept it.

“Til death do us part” seems out of sync with today’s divorce rate. Perhaps it should be altered to say, “til death – or disillusionment – do us part.” It seems that we are all too willing to trade in our partner for a newer model when life is not going the way we envisioned it. This may be due to the fact that the very foundation upon which the relationship is built is made of sand. (This is but one reason that the various 12-step fellowships ask newly recovering members to refrain from starting any new relationships in the first months of recovery.)

We all know the pain of loving someone who does not love us back. It makes little difference whether we discover that we are in “conditional love” at the beginning or at the end of a relationship. It does not matter. It hurts, and it can cause us to turn back inward, put back up our isolating walls, and try to find what it is about ourselves that we cannot be loved in return.

This preoccupation with one person’s rejection can cause us to lose sight of all the others who do in fact love us. This preoccupation with one person’s rejection can cause us to diminish our self-worth.

In a successful partnership, we are part of the solution or part of the problem. True love will actually increase our self-worth. If we, as partners, cannot accomplish this for each other, then we are either not allowing ourselves to see the self-worth in each other, or we are not allowing ourselves to share with our partner about the self-worth that we do see. Let us strive to be the solution.

If a couple takes the time to know each other deeply, openly, and spiritually, they will begin with a strong foundation on which to build their lives together.

Love your Live

source : googling

The Benefits of Love

It doesn't just put a sparkle in your eye—love can fight disease, boost immunity, and lower stress

Who doesn't love being in love? A true Valentine listens to you vent about work, lets you have that last slice of pizza, and (usually) remembers to take out the trash. He doesn't expect you to watch the Super Bowl. And he always thinks you're sexy, even in thermal underwear and bunny slippers.

Scientists have long been keen to prove that love gives us health benefits, too—beyond the obvious advantage of always having a date for New Year's Eve. Researchers can't say for sure that romance trumps an affectionate family or warm friendships when it comes to wellness. But they are homing in on how sex, kinship, and caring all seem to make us stronger, with health gains that range from faster healing to living longer.

The benefits of love are explicit and measurable:

• Protects your heart A University of Pittsburgh study found that women in good marriages have a much lower risk of cardiovascular disease than those in high-stress relationships.

• Leads to a longer life The National Longitudinal Mortality Study, which has been tracking more than a million subjects since 1979, shows that married people live longer. Plus, they have fewer heart attacks and lower cancer rates, and even get pneumonia less frequently than singles.

• Helps beat cancer University of Iowa researchers found that ovarian cancer patients with a strong sense of connection to others and satisfying relationships had more vigorous "natural killer" cell activity at the site of the tumor than those who didn't have those social ties. (These desirable white blood cells kill cancerous cells as part of the body's immune system.)  

Some experts think it won't be long before doctors prescribe steamy sex, romantic getaways, and caring communication in addition to low-cholesterol diets and plenty of rest. If that sounds like a happy Rx, here are ways to make the emerging evidence translate into real-life advice.


Love Your Life
source : googling